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Wednesday, February 07, 2024

Things that I still long for

Were someone to ask: what do you want out of life at your age and station in life? I would answer...

Firstly, that my daughter might have a long (but not too long, not as far as senility and decrepitude), healthy, safe and reasonably happy life, and pass on without shame and suffering.

Secondly, that God might grant the same favour to me - about the passing, that is - given that He knows I have already suffered a little more than my fair share of pain in these last sixty years.

Thirdly, that I might live out the rest of my life relieved of the agonizing financial insecurity that has been my constant companion ever since I began to earn my own keep, a long, long time ago: especially seeing that those who know and love me most have been assuring me for years that it is just a psychological burden that I still carry with me when it is no longer needed.

Fourthly, that my writing might be read more widely. For the readers' benefit much more than mine.

Those four things, in strictly decreasing order of priority. And NOTHING else, thank you.

Notice - nothing about fame and power and glory and glamour. Grew bored and wary about such silly, ephemeral things a long time ago.

1 comment:

Aditya Mishra said...

Dear Sir,

I hope you are doing well.
Reading this, especially the last line, immediately takes me to Einstein's 'theory of Happiness' that he shared with a courier who delivered something to Herr Einstein in his room at the Imperial Hotel in Tokyo during his tour of Japan in 1922. In a single line, he summed up what many fail to understand about contentment.
"A calm and modest life brings more happiness than the pursuit of success combined with constant restlessness."
One might argue that this is akin to a billionaire claiming that 'money isn't everything' and a supermodel who has won the genetic lottery making the old 'beauty is on the inside' argument. And rightfully so. This visit to Japan came after he'd won the Nobel Prize and was already well-known and respected in the world.
The way I see it is simply to find a way to be paid for your passion. I agree that this view is a hideously reductionist way of looking at his message but that's how I understand it best. If this doesn't work, one may at least try to keep in touch with things that make them happy. Writing, playing an instrument, cooking, sewing. Anything under the sun! It works as an antidote to modern life's many ailments.

I had recently visited my village and was taken aback by the slow pace of life there. Although I wouldn't last long there, I have decided that I'll visit as often as I can and take long walks along the canal, meandering like the river that feeds the fields, eat fresh fruits right from the trees and fresh vegetables grown in our small backyard and enjoy the daily cycles of the sun. Village life is no substitute for city life but I believe it to be a healthy escape. I barely checked my phone, walked barefoot when I could, ate simple, unprocessed food timely and had the clearest view of the night sky after ages.
I am in no way making a case for giving up the urban grind to settle in the rural parts of India. I just see them as recharging stations. Brief moments of comfort.
Money and freedom from financial worries should be a priority for everyone but we must know when to pause. We must be wise to see that the strings of attachment that bind us to materialistic pleasures do not become chains of slavery. Learning to let go and break free are as important, if not more, as learning to gather and hold on.
That's how I see Einstein's Theory of Happyness!
I realise I've strayed a little bit and apologise for that.

It is always a pleasure to read your writings, Sir! Also, I just noticed that this blog will soon hit the target of a million reads. Really happy that I am one in a million!

Thank you,
Aditya Mishra